


a dance with self-doubt

by green_piggy



Series: eirichel week 2019 [5]
Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones
Genre: F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Self-Esteem Issues, only slight but Yeah, set a bit after post game
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-28
Updated: 2019-06-28
Packaged: 2020-05-28 13:58:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19395571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/green_piggy/pseuds/green_piggy
Summary: The hardest part of war, arguably, is what comes after. Eirika wrestles with a familiar foe, but L’Arachel is always more than happy to offer her assistance.





	a dance with self-doubt

**Author's Note:**

> for both 'future' and 'dance' for day 5!  
> and we are DOOOOONE - i had a blast doing this; thank you all so much for your support!

Formal gatherings like these were such  _ delightful  _ little things, provided that they were done just right. They never were, of course, and L’Arachel felt suffocated in the waves of royals and senators all crowded into what felt like the world’s smallest guest room. All of these people who had been conspicuously absent during the war, without a single whisper of aid to dear Eirika’s efforts, now shoving each other out of the way to come up to L’Arachel and Eirika and everyone else involved and tell them about what a  _ wonderful  _ job they had done, wasn’t it incredible, saving all of Magvel and the entire world from the Demon King’s terrible darkness?

Did they think her stupid? Perhaps she enjoyed the guise of a joker a bit too often, but she was far from foolish.  _ Whose  _ nation was it, that had kept their Sacred Stone safe, when all others had failed? Certainly not any of theirs.

Speaking of lovely Eirika…

It didn’t take long to find her, not when you knew exactly where to look. L’Arachel excused herself towards the outskirts of the room, and took a glass of water from a nearby waiter with quiet thanks. She stepped outside and peeked down the corridor, catching a lone figure sitting on a bench in the gardens.

L’Arachel sat down next to her, tugging her dress from under her heels, and handed Eirika the glass with a smile. Eirika didn’t say anything, but she did smile back, shy but sincere as she took a long sip.

She put down the glass next to her and audibly sighed, running her hands through her hair. L’Arachel’s chest pounded with awkward worry. Seeing Eirika so openly stressed… it was a rarity, even during the most severe times of the war.

She coughed, but, before she could speak—

“I’m sorry,” Eirika murmured. Her fringe fell around her lowered head, making it impossible to see her face. Oh, how L’Arachel wanted to push back her hair and smooch her forehead, just to make the stressed wrinkles that must have been there fade away, even just a little.

“You have nothing to apologise for,” L’Arachel said. “I know you’re not one for socialising.”

“I  _ should  _ be,” she muttered, hand clenching at her side. “I’m the future queen. What kind of queen has to excuse herself from a perfectly mundane gathering mere minutes after it’s started?”

“Come, now, it’s been an hour or two.” L’Arachel gave her side a small nudge, smiling. She continued when Eirika looked over to her, trying not to wince at the dark shadows sitting like smudges under her eyes. Speckles of make-up caked her face, most of it wiped off or fading. “And you’re not the only queen-to-be out here, are you?”

At that, Eirika gave a wane smile. “I suppose not.”

“And I’d hardly call this meeting ‘mundane’. It’s the first of its kind after our grand victory!” L’Arachel pouted. “The vast majority of people in that room? They are cowards not even worth our attention. Common courtesy, of course, dedicates that we must smile and chitter and act in thrall to them all, but truthfully?” She let out a hefty sigh. “Were it not for such social necessities, why, I’d take the  _ greatest  _ of delights in beating them senseless.”

Eirika let out an ungraceful snort, chuckling and trying not to grin behind her hand. “I’ll, ah, pretend I didn’t hear that, hmm?”

“Please do.” L’Arachel grinned back. “I’d  _ hate  _ for this to ruin diplomatic relationships, especially with anyone who was of  _ absolutely  _ zero assistance to us when we actually needed it.”

“Of course.” But Eirika’s smile had been brief, and, in no time at all, she was back to frowning again.

Still, L’Arachel’s chest felt a bit looser than before. She was no longer blindly fumbling about. She loved Eirika, dearly, but she closed up on herself tighter than a bud in early spring when she wanted to, and it was difficult to pull it open without causing harm.

She would try, though.

“So.” L’Arachel kicked her foot idly against the mud, careful not to scruff her heel. “You don't like dancing?”

There was a long pause.

“It’s not so much as I don’t  _ like  _ dancing,” Eirika said quietly. “It’s just…”

“Hmm?”

“...I’m rather terrible at it, compared to most people. My brother—”

“Bah!” L’Arachel waved her arm dismissively. “Who cares about him - or anyone else - when it comes to  _ dancing?” _

“But - he excels at so many things—”

“And I don’t care. No one should care. You’re  _ you,  _ Eirika, and you have achieved plenty. Don’t put yourself down like that. I doubt your brother would want that, either.”

“That’s… a bit easier said than done, perhaps.”

A pause, and then, L’Arachel spoke gently: “...This isn’t just about dancing, is it?”

Eirika’s shoulders drooped. “It’s not.” She sighed, a finger running around the rim of her cup. “I’m not… I’m not  _ jealous  _ of my brother, of or anyone else. It’s just… I seem to always fall short of them, when I work so hard to just get to the level I’m at now. You’ve seen Ephraim.” A chuckle that was both rueful and fond. “People naturally flock to him. He has a skill with them I’ve not seen in anyone else. And his combat ability—”

“Eirika,” L’Arachel interrupted, for she had heard quite enough, “I would not trust that man to lead us out of a broken vase.”

“L-L’Arachel, that’s my—”

_ “Nor,”  _ she continued, louder than before, “would I trust him to lead a diplomatic meeting of any kind. Is he good with first impressions? Yes, but he would also rouse a chamber into bloody combat before the servants could make tea for them all.” Her voice softened. “And you know I speak the truth.”

“I…”

“You need to try to stop enhancing all your flaws and downplaying those found in everyone else,” L’Arachel said. Perhaps her words were harsh, but Eirika needed to hear them. This foolishness simply could  _ not  _ be allowed to continue. “Comparing yourself to others achieves nothing. I’ve said this before, and I’ll repeat it until you realise it for yourself - you are  _ you,  _ Eirika.” She held up her hand when Eirika opened her mouth.  _ “Yes,  _ there are things others can achieve that you cannot. But the inverse also holds! You have achievements and feats other people can only  _ dream  _ of. You helped lead an army to save Magvel. That, by itself, is more than enough if you were never to do a single good thing for the rest of your life.”

L’Arachel grasped Eirika’s hand, tightening her fingers against cold skin.

“But you have done  _ so  _ much more. You are selfless to a fault, Eirika. You are kind and strong and beautiful, and I myself strive to be half as noble as you are.”

If Eirika wasn’t blushing before, she most certainly was now. She made a strangled little noise of embarrassment, her free hand resting over her face as best as she could. Even in the gloomy darkness, however, it was impossible to ignore the redness of her cheeks.

“I could carry on, but I fear you may combust as if Lute had lit a Elfire tome inside of you,” L’Arachel said. “So I shall save it for another time!”

“You don't…” Eirika's face was furiously bright.  _ “Surely  _ you can't…”

“I mean every word of it.” L'Arachel gave her a soft smile. “”When have I lied to you, dear Eirika?”

Time passed as Eirika furrowed her eyebrows, most likely thinking of some response to further put herself down. Eventually, she just sighed, and gave L'Arachel a small smile more sincere than what she displayed around most.

“You haven't,” she said. “And… I suppose putting myself down excessively isn't healthy.”

“Of course not!” L'Arachel cupped her hands on her lap. “If it's not something you wouldn't say to another, what makes it acceptable to say to yourself?”

“That's…” A quiet hum. “I'd never thought of it like that before. Thank you.”

“Ah, you needn't thank me.” L'Arachel could feel her own cheeks reddening. “You can't dramatically change over night, but we _ can  _ make small steps for an improvement in the future!” She stood up with a flourish and held her hand out, dipping into a bow. “For now, my dear, shall we cite sudden illness and retire to your chambers?”

“Oh…” Hope flashed across Eirika's face, replaced by her nippling her lip with a glance towards the party. “Is that… I'd love to, but it hardly seems proper.”

“Nonsense. You need the break, and I can't tolerate these buffoons for another moment.”

“Well, then.” Eirika wrapped her hand around L'Arachel's and pulled herself up. She'd opted for heels, while L'Arachel had not, and she stood so tall that L'Arachel had to tilt her head back to see her fully. “Who am I to disagree with my beloved?”

“With your—” L'Arachel had to resist the instinct of yanking her hand away to cover her face.  _ “I'm  _ the one meant to be comforting you!”

“And no one could have done a better job of it.” Eirika squeezed her fingers, her hand the only warmth against the nipping chill of the early night. “Shall we be off before anyone notices?”

“I'd love to.” With a dramatic sigh, L'Arachel rested her head on Eirika's shoulder, her cheek resting against the soft fabric. Eirika linked her arm through L'Arachel's with a warm laugh, and, together, they went in silence towards their shared bedroom.


End file.
